Saturday, April 2, 2011

The Illogic of it All

Happy Saturday, everyone.  Today I want to talk a little about the inner workings of my mind.  I drive to work very early in the morning.  It is a long drive on a lonely road in the dark and that gives me a lot of time to think.  Sometimes I ponder on what God is doing in my life, sometimes I think of what needs to get done at work, sometimes I think of this blog, and sometimes I think of nothing at all.  At other times, my mind delves into deeper things,  I look up at the sky and see the countless stars and I think that I am a small blip alive for a short time on a tiny blue dot in the middle of the vastness of the Universe.  My mind wanders and I think of why me, why here, why everything.  It just makes no sense to me why God would choose to save me and all my faults and failures on this small blue planet in the middle of nothing.  Surely there are more beautiful planets and surely there are more beautiful things that God can create.  My mind then wanders deeper into wondering why God made me me, or even us, at all.  Surely He knew how much we would hurt Him.  Surely He knew that our creation meant the future death of His own son.  I know He loves us, but He had a chance to not even makes us to fall in love with us and make something better, something that would not hurt Him.  The very idea of humanity and salvation just makes no sense to me at all.

Please bear with me a moment.  I am getting to my point.  What I just talked about was my brain doing its meager job of figuring out God.  I can not figure out God at all.  I can not figure out why He made me or us.  I can not figure out why He sent His son. I can not figure out the motivation behind creation of why He bothers to love us at all.  The mind of God is a complete and utter mystery to me.  And you know what, that is a good thing.  What would it be if we could gave into the mind of God and figure out what makes it tick?  I can not even understand what it means to tick for God let alone how.  God is so much more than I can not just figure out but even imagine.  My brain can not even comprehend all that God even is let alone understand how He works.  God is so much more that I can not even comprehend what I don't know let alone try to learn it. 

God is God, a simple three letter word that somehow sums up all that He is.  It almost does not seem right.  I do not even know what I do not understand about Him let alone understand what I do know about Him.  And so when my feeble brain tries to ponder the imponderable and understand how what I do not even understand why it exists (me) relates to something I can not even understand the existence of, it cries out how illogical the whole thing really is.  It is impossible to understand any of it when we look at things from our perspective and so our brains cry out sometimes in unbelief.  Sadly many stay in that state never able to accept what they can not understand.  They continue to look at things from our infinitesimal point of view and think they know it all.  They say they are the intellectual ones but they are too proud to ever look outside their own brains to understand just how little they do really know.

I found the secret, though.  When I ponder myself and how I fit into everything I am lost in my insignificance.  When I ponder God and meditate on all that He is, I have a better understanding of who I am.  My significance is in that God does love me, not why He loves me.  My significance is in that God did create me, not in why I was created.  My significance is in that Jesus did die for my sins, not in why.  My significance is in that I am created in the image and likeness of the awesome and wonderful true and living God.  Understanding things is overrated anyway.  What would life be if you knew everything, there would be no wonder or amazement, just one predictable day after another.  I love that I do not understand God and I love that I do not have to.  I would rather just sit, as a child, eyes wide with wonder, each and every day amazed at what He has done and continues to do.
For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways," says the LORD.
For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, And My thoughts than your thoughts.  Isaiah 55:8-9 NKJV

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