Thursday, August 9, 2012

Happy Belated Birthday To Me


Two weeks ago, I celebrated my 38th birthday.  I was going to write a birthday post then, but for whatever reason other things came up.  So today, albeit to weeks late, I will spend time to reflecting on what God is doing in my life.  Besides, it has been quite some time since I have done a personal update.  I think at this time there is a parable that comes to mind. 
And He said to them, "Which of you shall have a friend, and go to him at midnight and say to him, 'Friend, lend me three loaves; for a friend of mine has come to me on his journey, and I have nothing to set before him'; and he will answer from within and say, 'Do not trouble me; the door is now shut, and my children are with me in bed; I cannot rise and give to you'? I say to you, though he will not rise and give to him because he is his friend, yet because of his persistence he will rise and give him as many as he needs. So I say to you, ask, and it will be given to you; seek, and you will find; knock, and it will be opened to you.  Luke 11:5-9 NKJV
As many of you know, my wife and I have been praying for things for quite some time.  We have been praying to sell our home, to buy a home, to have a child, and for me to have less of a commute.  Ultimately, I would love for my wife to not have to work.  That is a prayer and a dream of mine, but that will require God to work where I am completely unable to.  On top of that, over the past year, I have had some back issues that lasted for a few months then went away for a month then came back for a few more months.  Thankfully, the Lord did answer those prayers and I have been pain free since March.  Some of you might remember that about six years ago, I dealt with tinnitus caused by a TMJ (jaw joint) disorder.  That has come back again a few weeks ago, but prayerfully I will move past that once again.  It is not particularly painful, but the tinnitus can be a nuisance at times.  I ask for your prayers in that area as well. 

So, as you can see, we have been praying for a lot.  Considering I keep writing about it, we are still waiting on the answer to those prayers.  I am not a particularly patient person and I can see how God is really using this to teach me some patience.  I get frustrated at times, but each time God shows me why I am still waiting.  The fact is that I can not change jobs until after I close on a new home so as not to affect financing.  We have no room for a baby until we get a new home.  We also need my current health plan to pay for the issues surrounding our desire for a baby.  We can not buy a house until we sell ours.  We can not sell ours until we know we can get approved for a mortgage on a new home  We could not get approved for a mortgage of any realistic amount with only my income and my wife's credit only recently qualified for a mortgage.  As you can see, the waiting has been long, but it has been necessary.  While the delay has been frustrating, there are very good reasons behind it.  God is moving all the pieces into place and as I see more pieces come into place, I get more and more excited about what is to come. 

God is not lazy or sleepy like this hesitant friend.  He has His own reasons for allowing our persistence before His answer.  Sometimes that reason is that it just is not the right time.  Sometimes His reason is that He is working a purpose in our lives (like teaching patience) and the wait is necessary to teach that purpose.  Sometimes He wants to train our faith to remain encouraged despite the long wait.  Whatever the reason, it is not because God does not want to act, it is just that God is waiting for the right time to act.  Then there are times where God is acting behind the scenes to work out the best answer to our prayer.  Sometimes we are willing to settle for old stale bread if we can just get it now when God is preparing fresh warm bread for us so long as we have the patience to wait for it. 

And so that is where we are.  We are waiting on the Lord.  We are waiting for a home, a sale, a job, and a baby.  I am also waiting for God to cure me once again of this TMJ issue and to continue to protect me on those long, tired drives (and they are tired, sometimes concernedly so).  When you know what's coming, the wait is so much easier.  For example, at an amusement park, we will wait for hours for a brief ride because we know how much fun it will be.  We know it will be worth it.  Then there are times when you kind of have to believe that the wait will be worth while when it comes to pass.  In other words, it comes down to faith.  I need to have faith now that once the wait is over I will see how worth while it all was.  I believe it will be, and I believe God is using this time to strengthen and encourage my faith.  I believe that God is doing the same with whatever you are waiting for in your life.
Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.  Hebrews 11:1 NKJV

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